Gratitiude

I have been brought to tears more than a few times, living the life I am living today.  It hits me at odd times, but the feeling of relief, gratitude, peace...I feel the whole mix of those and more.  I don't know if I can explain it well enough, but if you could feel my heart, you would understand.  

 Has it really been over 2 years?  The first year was first spent disconnected, then making a major life change.  That had to happen before the rest could fall into place.  

The 2nd year was spent setting up my home, becoming more independent, and realigning myself.  I wouldn't say I was fractured, because I continued to live, learn and grow, but I'm still sweeping up and discarding of the tiny scraps that show up from time to time.  That's getting much easier.  I can't say I've completely forgiven, but that will come, eventually.  

Now, 3 months into the 3rd year, I am happy to say that my independent spirit has been revived.  My home is wonderful, my pets are great, and I am getting my budget squared away.  

Starting up a new household takes moola and time.  I have plenty of time, and limited moola, but I'm making it work.  

I am blooming where I have been planted, and thriving.

But...

As much as I hate to admit, I am feeling a little lonely.  

I don't have anyone to do anything with.  I would like to make a friend of the male persuasion to do things with.  I don't want to sit here every day all day all summer, again.  I want to go to Estate Sales and Thrift Stores and Garage Sales.  Maybe even start up a You Tube channel.  Be a reseller.  

I have so much love in me.  After being in a loveless relationship for 20 years, and being the age that I am, I would sure like to share that love with someone cool for the rest of my life.  

Someone big and strong, funny, loving and caring.  Someone that will make it easy for me to give up my clubhouse.  

Someone that would love me back.  

Someday.  Hopefully someday soon.  

Until then, I am going to continue to learn and grow, love my life, and be grateful for all of it.  Every single bit.  

Play Nice! 
xxoo

Oh What a Beautiful Day!

 Well, here we are, thought that since it's Saturday I could give y'all a little update on how life's been the last couple of weeks...

I'm proud and happy to say that it has been quiet, peaceful, and drama free.  

My sister's 2nd car is completely repaired and road reliable!  First time in almost a year that she has dependable transportation.  

My little family in Germany are doing so well.  A busy, normal family, blessed and grateful.  Young Son and fam are doing well, making progress and learning!  They too are blessed and grateful.  

I am so proud, blessed and grateful for them.  

My immediate neighbors in the complex I live in are so chill, we wave and be pleasant, but I am not in the mood to get to know or to chit chat with them, and it seems they feel the same.  Perfect.

Greg and Brad are cool.  Brad is growing like a weed, and the past 2 mornings Greg has not woke me up, and both have been on my bed with me when I wake up.  I still wake before 8 am, but it's so nice not to be woke up with a startle.  

Right now they are in their rambunctious time.  All the morning chores are done, they've been fed, used the litter box, and soon each will find a comfy spot, they both have their favorites, and they'll be napping for about 3 hours.  That will give me time to do some crafty things that I can't do while they are up and about, because everything is a plaything!  

My naptime goal today is to get my peg-loom threaded for a rug that I am going to start for my sister.  She has given me some of her old clothes, thinking she's donating to me.  I know a pair of those jeans were Dave's.  

He's been gone almost a year now.  I think back to where we were this time last year...I was still living there, he was so sick...it was so awful and sad.  She's doing fine, better all the time.  The truth will set you free.  

Looks like the boys have calmed down, and I've been sitting here long enough.  Hopefully I will have enough string to get this next project started!  

Play Nice!  xxoo

Big Boy Brad (black) and Good Boy Greg (in the box)

Hello September

 2 weeks yesterday since Brad came to live with us.  I am happy to report that he and Greg get along as well as I had hoped!  

Miss Petunia, the bedgraggled, gone to seed petunia plant I found in the dumpster, is thriving well on my front porch.  She gets 2 good drinks of water every day.  Most all the dead leaves have been removed, and she has new growth spurting out of her everywhere.

As I sit here this morning, there is a nice, cool breeze blowing in the window.  I have some relaxing music on.  Sipping my coffee, thinking my thoughts, watching the boys play...

It makes me so thankful for where I am in my life right now.  So Thankful. 

My big regret is that the part of my heart that lives far, far way isn't here for all of us to enjoy this time.  I don't have anyone to do things with.  I'd love to go to some thrift stores, or estate auctions, or street festivals...events, activities, and I know full well that I can go by myself, and I have before...but that just makes me feel alone, and vulnerable.

So, before I start winding my way down that rabbit hole, I will say that I am happy where I am, and with the reality of my life at this particular point in time.  

Everything happens for a reason, and it all works out exactly as it is supposed to.  I believe in that, and for the past couple of years it's been working out pretty well for me.   

But, If I could have just one wish, it would be that my kids could "kiss and make up."  I can't do it for them.  

Not sure if anyone is reading this yet, if you are and want to leave me a comment, that'd be cool.

I think Greg is the only cat I know that doesn't seek out a patch in the sun.  Brad sure does, though.  

Play Nice!  

xxoo

Expanding

 My life expanded by one last weekend.  Greg so needed someone to play with.

This is Brad

He is 11 weeks old.

No problems at meal time.

Big Boy Brad

I really thought I would be enough for Greg, but he clearly needed someone to play with.  Luckily my niece is the pet finder of the family.  All I had to do was tell her what I wanted that morning, and I was home with Brad by 6 pm that same day!  She's amazing!

 

She's 21 years old now.  

The first night was hard for me.  My brain knew that Greg needed to do his cat thing when introducing a new cat in the family.  My heart, however, didn't want him to be too "rough."  

My sis and I chatted a bit about it, and by the next day, Big Boy Brad was stalking Greg, and Greg was just chill laying there twitching his tail.  He knows, he's cool with it. 

There are no more plans for expansion around here, unless...well, you never know what's going to happen on any given day.  I mean, if a sweet little Chihuahua needed a home...

Play Nice!  xxoo

Another Decade Has Passed

 Since my last writing here, absolutely everything has changed.  

I guess it doesn't really matter how I got where I am now, because there's nothing I can do to change it.  The things that happened that got me here, well, I am a firm believer in that based on the choices you made, you will be right where you are supposed to be.

I live alone now, well not alone.  My cat, Greg, lives with me.  We've been together for 8 months now, which is exactly how long I have been in my own place.  

Lately my days have been full of creating, I'm discovering more about myself every day.  I mean, I knew I craved, prayed for, wished for, and dreamed of the day that I would have a little place just like this.  And while it started off as a completely blank slate, with the bare minimum of possessions, it is becoming just what I wanted it to be.  

Even just going to the kitchen to get another cuppa coffee makes me feel so happy.  I look around at this wonderful hodge podge of furniture and what not, old possessions and new possessions, and I feel so happy.  

This truly is my Little Slice of Paradise and getting better every day!  

xxoo